Sexting is a touchy subject. Texting your husband is naturally going to have some sexual overtones at times. Talking dirty to him over text at times is fine (and in this book, I’ll teach you how to do it).
The problem comes in when you send explicit pictures to each other. I know many young couples exchange nudes but I would strongly warn you from this. I’m not saying this as someone who’s afraid or unaware of technology. In fact, the opposite. There are actual dedicated websites on the internet which post pictures of Muslim women in varying states of undress. Men go onto these websites and arouse themselves by looking at a woman going from full hijab to wearing nothing.
The sad reality is that you simply don’t know where your pictures can end up. Divorces happen and angry ex-husbands can be vindictive. Even if your husband is the most honorable man in the world, phones can get lost, misplaced, or even borrowed. It takes just a few minutes to transfer an entire digital library of images to a computer. Once your photos are on someone else’s computer, they can be disseminated all over the world in a matter of minutes. As many Hollywood celebrities found to their horror last year, many phones back up their photos to a cloud. That cloud can (and has been) hacked, resulting in thousands of images being leaked over the internet.
I personally know a hijabi sister, very active in her community, who made the mistake of sending such photos to her husband. After her divorce, they were leaked over the internet along with her name. He denies having anything to do with it but the fact remains that whenever a person Googles her name, nude images of her show up in Google. Even after spending money and hiring someone to contact websites to remove her photos, an occasional one will still resurface under her name.
It’s really not worth the risk.
With all that said, I’m realistic. I know most couples will still at least
occasionally send each other nude images. If you’re going to do it despite my advice to the contrary, make sure to take these precautions:
1. Don’t send a picture via text or other medium where it can be easily stored on his phone. Use Snapchat. There are still plenty of ways to save Snapchat photos but they require intention and effort. In the event of a divorce, your ex-husband won’t have a trove of nude photos saved on his phone that can be “accidentally” leaked onto the internet.
2. Don’t include your face in such pictures. In the event of those photos finding their way onto the internet, not including your face allows the images to be kept separate from your identity.
3. Never, never, never keep nude images stored in any format. The day your little kid swipes through your phone’s photos to find an ‘Eid picture and stumbles upon photos of you naked is a day that will permanently scar both of you.